It Will Pass.

Who is wise?
  The one who learns from every person…

- Talmud, Ethics of the Fathers (4:1)

You really can learn something from everybody. Check out my blog post, Solution to Jealousy, for more info about that. 

This story may seem at first like it's not going anywhere, but I promise it gets better:)

Last semester I was taking a chemistry lab, which I dreaded. As I got off the bus and walked towards the building in which I would be spending the next 3 hours of my Friday afternoon, I took deep breaths while reminding myself that as soon as I would finish my lab work, I would be free for the weekend. I walked into the building, through the heavy door that led to the basement, down the stairs and into the basement. My 40 or so lab mates unhappily stood against the wall, waiting for the grumpy chemical storage director to let us into the lab. 

The building, the basement, the lab, the director (who would yell at a single student if he or she failed to maintain eye contact with him while he was speaking to the entire group of 20 or so students. Was that necessary? No.), and the unhappy-looking students were all contributions to the unsettling atmosphere that made chemistry lab more nerve-wrecking than it had to be. 

However, despite the deep-rooted darkness that the room itself emitted due to the 20 or so years of being managed by the grumpy chemical storage directory (who reminded me of Grendel, who lived far-off in his cave and was a hated figure far and wide, known to many generations of strong men who despised him. Similarly, this man was known for his hatred for freshmen, who were innocently trying to pass their first year of college), the door that slammed every time it closed and let off an angry-sounding echo, and the influx of nervous college students who were just trying to survive . . . 

There was a faint light. 

My TA. 

One of the most upbeat people I have ever met. He was always smiling. He was one of those people who had a kind face (I know this sounds like a strange way of describing somebody. This is a direct translation of a Russian- which is my first language- figure of speech. In Russian you would say somebody has a "dobraya leytso," which means "a kind face", when describing somebody who looks like a good person). He was so nice and easygoing. He would make jokes and answer questions without making you feel stupid. 

I was always inspired by his positivity. His positivity had such an impact on me, that I would think of him when trying to deal with a stressful situation. I would ask myself, "How would Nick respond to this situation?"

To get to the point of this post . . .

It was on the last day of lab, notably one of the happiest days of my life, that I had the opportunity to ask him. Wether it be that we wanted to have a discussion about life or something else that boggled our minds, he was happy to help in any way that he could. He even offered us to visit him at the library while he studied. And I will add that he was only 2 years older- he was taking graduate courses during his junior year of college. He was like the person you wish could be your best friend, but that you knew would never be your best friend. Such a great guy. 

I asked him how he is always so positive? I recalled how he one day told us with a smile on his face about the time his car stopped running and he had to wait for his dad for an hour to come get him. I would have been freaking out, upset over the fact that I was losing time and had to wait for someone to come get me. I would have been mad at the freaking car for not working!!! (Yes, I'm crazy. I am aware). 

This was his golden answer: Just know that everything will pass. Whatever difficulty you are dealing with right now- it will pass. It's just a phase. It won't be like this forever. 

This may sound like a lame answer . . . So many thoughts come to mind in response. 

Certain things have greater effects on future outcomes. 

What if it's not just a phase?

What if that theory applies to your life, but won't/ doesn't apply to mine?

Life must have been really chill for you; you must be lucky. 

Etc. 

But no. 

He is so right. 

Even if things may not end the way we want them to, and even if those things have major effects in the future . . .

Life goes on.

Pain fades. It's still there, no doubt about that. But it fades. 

The next phase of life will come and your focus will be something else. You may be stressed or afraid of something now, but in some time- it will be over. Life will move on, and eventually you will too. 

I look back on so many times in my life when I obsessed over something because I was afraid. For example, my AP Biology class junior year of high school. I was horrified when I couldn't get AP credit for an entire year of biology. It was rough, but now I'm a sophomore in college and am done with biology. Would the AP credit have saved time, money and energy? Yes, of course, but life went on and I am here now and life is still moving on. Life has its ups and downs- that definitely wasn't the last time I would feel disappointed- but it goes on. 

And really all we as humans can decide to do is swim above the currents. Because this is life. And if we are living these lives, then let's make the most of it. 

If you enjoyed this blog post, I recommend you read On the Idea of Happiness.