This Week's Focus: Mindfulness

Heads up- this is a short post! 

I am back and writing from another country!

I have had an amazing opportunity to travel with 48 other college students, and multiple mentors, to the holiest place on earth, Jerusalem, where I am taking seminars on personal growth and development. Seminars range from building lasting relationships to character development. 

Two topics that we discussed last week are judging others favorably/ giving others the benefit of the doubt, and going out of one's way to help another person. 

These two seminars really spoke to me. 

A lot of times, I tend to make conclusions about different situations very quickly- especially situations that make me unhappy. I am so quick to jump to conclusions, that I will even conclude that I know someone's intentions when I feel that they have done me wrong. If somebody does or says something I am not fond of, I almost automatically judge that person negatively. 

For the rest of the week, after sitting through this seminar, I started looking at situations and people from a different perspective. The woman leading this seminar said something very wise, something I have never thought before: maybe the person who did something wrong lost an internal battle. Maybe this person did blank, but s/he tried to fight the urge to do or say it. It is very hard to have this mindset. Giving others the benefit of the doubt? No way! But we all have situations in which we know we shouldn't do or say something, and we do it anyway. This is not to say that this internal battle is an excuse! It is just that we all have this internal battle, and while it is our job to make sure we win these battles, we all have situations in which we don't. 

Try this: Step back from the situation for a moment. Where is this person coming from? Is there a problem this person has that you may or may not be aware of? Is it possible that this person's behavior may be coming from a place of pain, fear, self-defense, or desperation? 

As for the second topic, going out of one's way to help another person, I really have not been in this mindset lately. There was a time when I was more mindful of others, but somewhere along the way I got selfish, honestly. I was more sensitive to others feelings, speaking and doing only after thinking about how my words and actions might affect those around me. I think I got lazy and careless, not putting as much effort as I probably should be. All of these seminars that I have been taking have reminded me to not let go of the drive to be better, to grow towards being the best person I can be (in this sense), and to not give up on this challenge. Changing one's character is one of the hardest things for a person to do. It takes a lot of willpower, in certain situations.

"I should probably not make this comment because it may hurt someone's feelings."
"I probably should try to not roll my eyes every time I think about how tired I am because the guide is talking and trying to explain the significance of this ancient tree." (I've noticed that I do roll my eyes a lot. It's really rude to do this, especially while someone is speaking. Body language speaks just as loudly as words do).

With this goal, as for me, I think the best way to work on this is to just think more about how you act on a regular bases. What vibe do you give off? Do you give off positive energy?
My best tip is this: THINK before you do. 
Really, really think.
Many times I talk myself out of acting proper and doing the right thing.
So really think about your actions and what you're going to say/do.
When you make the right decision, acknowledge the fact that you did, and feel proud!