First Week In Israel (Joys of Israel Series)

It has only been a week since this adventure started, but it feels like it has been a month. 

First off, it is still unbelievable to me that I am here. Though I have been planning this trip for months, I am still in awe of simply being here. This country means so much to me. I feel so blessed and fortunate to be able to be here. 

A lot of people think coming here was simple. People think it's like running away from real life to take a break from reality. Though this opportunity is something which I am obviously enjoying, I wouldn't say it's easy. If anything, it's extremely challenging. 

For starters, everything here is on a much smaller scale and much less "comfortable." The comforts I enjoy in the US are definitely not a given here. I live in a dorm (though with awesome people), have to share a bathroom and room. I have to use a communal laundry machine, which honestly is sort of gross (especially the one here, thanks to some uncleanly people). Even my bed. The mattress (to put it nicely) sucks. I can't comfortably sit on it like I do at home. I have to keep my toiletries and makeup in my room. My closet space is minimal. I have to take public transportation everywhere, which makes me feel like an old Russian grandmother in Brooklyn. People can be rude, overcharge you because you don't know the prices anyway. You get shoved by people all day because they don't have a word for "excuse me." Everythign here is extremely expensive, and there are few options when tryign to make purchases (in the US we have options galore). Whereas here we have bugs galore. Bugs in our rooms, bathrooms, kitchen area (which I wouldn't dare to use because it's just as bad as the laundry room. 

The list goes on and on. 

But I'm more afraid of leaving than I am of staying. And I have 6 months here (minimum- I'll probably end up staying 9), yet I fear the day I will have to leave. 

At the Western Wall right before Yom Kippur

I spent the day in the Old City of Jerusalem. Every year I watch the same video of crowds of people standing by the Western Wall. It’s the place to be. This year, not only did I get to see it live, but I got to be a part of it. If I were alone, with no one around me- I think I would have cried. I hate crying, and I would have cried like a baby. The scene, the people, the passion, the reality of it all... it's so personal and spiritual and heart warming. 

On our way back to campus from the Old City, I quietly sat and looked out the bus window. For 25 hours, the country sat still. Even the air space was closed. Roads were empty. Highways were silent. And I felt anxious. Peaceful and enlightened, but anxious as well.

Because of this fear of having to leave, of not being able to grasp all of it. This fear of letting go of it all, of not getting to see this every day. 

There is just something about being here. Today I think I came to find the words that sum it up. 

Community. Belonging. Family. Together. History. 

This state, this country... it's part of our definition as a people. As a people with the longest history. 

And the price that we have had to pay for it. 

Just last week, right before Yom Kippur- a man by the name of Ari Fuld was murdered. He was murdered by a Palestinian teenager. He was murdered because he was a Jew. People will say what they want about Israel, what it is, it's creation, it's current state. At the end of the day, the murder here is for one reason and one reason only: Anti-Semitism. 

Here we are getting murdered for owning less than 1% of the Middle East. Here we are getting murdered in a land that we payed for, fought for, built up. Here we are getting killed for creating a home because we were kicked out of all of our previous homes (including this one, which actually was our first home- I know, doesn't make any sense). Here we are getting killed for not allowing ourselves to be killed off. 

It's been an emotional time for me personally (being here, getting adjusted), but also for us on a national level. Our people are mourning yet another stolen soul, yet another soul removed from us. Another piece of our hearts are broken off. 

A whole community, a whole nation come together to remember the impact this man had on our people. 

 - - - - - - -

Of course this journey starts off with a familiar face, meeting someone you know through other people you know- it's just the way it always works out. You go your separate ways at the airport once you make it into the country but you know every direction here is really the same direction nontheless. All one and the same spirit, yet the differences will make you question how this place exists all in one piece as it is. 

A couple of natives casually scream at each other while I hold back my laughs. They ask you where you're going in a language you don't completely know, yet you somehow answer quickly enough not to feel stupid. Some people mumble something to you and you know that's your cue to get out of their way.  

We ride through the Middle Eastern desert, which doesn't look so much like a desert. It's the land of milk and honey. We get there by half a miracle, for the drivers here aren't really drivers- they're just making up the rules as they go. Drive in the middle of 2 lanes? Sure. Park on the sidewalk? No problem. Almost get into a three-vehicle collision (bus, car, and motorcycle- true story)? Why not? 

This ain't Jersey.

Go to the open market to get some fresh food. Which by the way sometimes comes with little bugs too. Like I said- bugs galore. 

Still waiting to get shoved by an old lady wearing a head scarf. Happens every time I’m here and it always throws me off. This time I won't be confused. It'll be more like a, "you can't surprise me because I've been looking forward to this."

It's going to happen, I promise. And when it does, I'll be ecstatic because it's my official welcome 🙂

I'll be prepared to live the hectic New York City life when I get back. 

Heck, I'll be more than ready. 

Before the Beginning

I have had many beginnings in the past several years. 
As we all have had- in our own ways.
This one, I think, is the best one yet.

Over the next several months, I will be traveling to Israel and delving into the wisdom of ancient texts. I will be immersed in a culture and environment of self-development and growth. I will be improving on two of the three languages which I speak/write/read (Russian and Hebrew). I will be working for an organization whose mission statement itself is a personal passion of mine. I will be scouring the open market, getting shoved by elderly women on public transportation (has happened before and I am only waiting for it to happen again), admitting sheepishly that I don't speak the local language well enough to actually have a conversation. When I ask for directions in Hebrew, that's all I know!!! I can't actually understand the directions you give me in Hebrew. 

There is always that time period before the actual "adventure" begins. I just finished my internship, prepping my phone service and luggage, getting in all those doctor appointments, trying to figure out if I have any issues I should face now while in the country where I can actually formulate incomprehensible sentences the issues that must be dealt with😅. Saying goodbye to friends, who are also moving on in their own directions. They are going West and I am going East. This part of the experience is easiest yet hardest in several ways. Easiest because you haven't yet jumped out of your airplane. Hardest because you're itching to get out.

What makes me happiest is that I have made an atypical decision. I am doing the not-so-standard thing. I am doing something that I know I will never have the opportunity to do again. If I want this opportunity ever, then I better grab it. So I did. 

You know those little postcards you see on Pinterest or those adventurous lines in poems that refer to taking chances and doing things that scare the sh*t out of you? Well, this is my postcard. This is my poem. 

I am on my way to unknown things. 

Building Meaningful Relationships at Work

I finalized my flight to Israel 🇮🇱today!

Since I will be going abroad for several months, I needed something temporary in between taking my nursing boards and leaving.

I decided to do a medical affairs internship so that I can make some money, and to give me something to do with my summertime.

This experience has ended up being so much more valuable than I thought it would be. Not only have I learned a tremendous amount about the other aspects of healthcare (which are VAST, let me tell you), but I have also acquired vital knowledge about work-space social life (which is more important than I realized).

When my friends asked about my finally being done with the dreadful nursing board exam (officially an RN!!), I told them I was taking the rest of the summer to just relax.

"By getting an internship?" they asked with confused faces. 

Because I love my experience with this internship, it doesn't even feel like work. I attribute this to the relationships I have with my coworkers and to the work environment.

I have learned a tremendous amount about work relationships and the importance of having a healthy work environment. I have found that the best way to make relationships into something meaningful is to simply put meaning into your relationships. This means actually caring about the people with whom you want to create relationships. Care to know what they're passionate about, things that make them laugh, things they hate...

And you will end up learning so much more than you can ever imagine.

For example, my one coworker and I have two opposing political views. However, we feel comfortable discussing why we believe what we believe... and agreeing to disagree. I'm not saying you should go around talking to everyone about your political views (because some people don't know how to agree to disagree), but I am saying that true interest in hearing what another person has to say and interest in what another person has to offer... allows you to learn other perspectives. I have learned so much about the way people on her end of the political spectrum think. I have learned how to communicate better with those who have other views on such heavy topics.

We take the time to discuss our hobbies and have inside jokes now! All this makes working here so enjoyable because I feel comfortable with these people and we feel a mutual understanding between each other.

Not all jobs are as flexible as this one, perhaps. Here, we are in a single office. We spend several hours together every day that we are here. I know, for example, with nursing there is not as much time to sit down and talk... however there are windows of opportunity and taking that energy to get to know your coworkers and the people with whom you spend so much of your time... is so absolutely worth it and necessary! You will feel more excited for work, and not dread the long hours (or at least not as much as you may have otherwise).

The most important lesson that I have learned is putting in the energy to develop relationships with others... and that it doesn't even always take much energy. You may be surprised by how much you actually enjoy certain people on a personal level.

Next time you go to work, take a genuine interest in learning at least one thing about a coworker. Ask a question with genuine curiosity. Make sure to remember an important day of theirs (birthday, wedding, my coworker is prepping for a marathon so I make sure to ask about her training). There is nothing to lose and everything to gain!

Oh, and always 😊 and say good morning ☀️

Replace Anxiety with Excitement

Sometimes life can be scary. We have to deal with the unknown, intimidating situations, and scenarios that we may not feel equipped to handle. 

But did you know that there is a way to turn fear (negative connotation) into excitement (positive connotation)???

Some time ago I heard of the concept that fear and excitement are activated in the same part of the brain and that the brain can actually be tricked into believing that something fearful is actually exciting. 

"Fear activates the hypothalamus in the same way as excitement, and when it’s predictable it activates the brain’s reward center as well. And that really gets at the heart of the matter. We don’t like fear per se, we like predictable fear. It gets the limbic system fired up, making us feel more alive..." - Alex Korb, Ph.D. (Reference: here)

Just being aware of this fact, and not even necessarily understanding exactly how it works, is enough to help us become more cognizant of our opportunities to make stressful situations more bearable... if not completely exhilarating.

Next time you feel anxiety or fear....instead of focusing your energy on not being nervous or trying to brush off the nerves, think about how this experience can or will be exciting. 

Taking an exam? 
Think of this as an opportunity to showcase your skills.

Public speaking?
You are getting to share something important with others. You are working on yourself and making yourself better. 

Interview?
You are creating new opportunities. New doors are opening for you.

In life, there is already enough to be nervous about. Don't sweat the small stuff. If you can help it, try to find the thrill in things. 

How you can allow time to be on your side

Today I would like to write about something that I have started taking extremely seriously. 

Time. 
Hours. Minutes, seconds. 

They all add up. Before we know it, time has forever slipped out of our hands and there is absolutely nothing that we can do to get it back. If anything, we can only learn and agree to use the rest of the time that we have left- to do more and be more than we were previously.

The good and the bad news is that time is finite. This is a good thing because it reminds us of the value of every moment. We aren’t just existing. We are creating realities in a measurable spectrum, in an immeasurable capacity. We have so much potential as human beings to create, imagine, and bring about change. 

It is extremely unfortunate that despite this immense potential that is existent within and by us people(yes, people create potential because we are the cause by which potential has come into existence because it is we who hold this potential)... so many of us allow it to slip away aimlessly. Or rather, we devalue our time by spending it and using it on means which have no value or purpose at all. 


Think about all the time that you spend and all of the activities on which you spend that time. What percentage of your time are you doing something that is actually benefitting you? How much time do you aimlessly spend on your phone or computer? It’s way too easy to lose something that is so valuable, to things (and sometimes even people) who have no value to us whatsoever. 

So how can you allow time to be on your side? 

By being conscious. By being aware. By caring about how you spend it! By taking small steps throughout your day to question if you are spending your time in a valuable manner. By saying no to certain things. By planning just how you are going to make sure that you not waste anymore time than you already have!!! (Will soon be making a blog post about how planning actually helps with reducing anxiety, though this may seem obvious to some). 

Try to become more conscious of how you spend your time and who you spend your time with. Make it a goal for yourself to be able to honestly say that every moment you spend is an investment to your short and long term happiness, success and worth. 

After all, time was given to us for free. The time we have now was not payed for. We didn’t have to fight for time on this earth. We didn’t have to work hard to be born. Perhaps what came after wasn’t all that easy, but you have time on this earth either way. So take it and do the best that you can with it. Take advantage of it. 

Investing in yourself is your greatest asset. Time is not on your side (but only if you don’t allow it to be).

The Purpose Factor

There comes a point in one's life when he or she realizes that the future is entirely in his or her hands. For me, this point was graduating from college and passing my nursing board exam (YAY!!!)

Up until this point in life, everything was protected by a cushion. You know, living at home and off of mom and dad. Some individuals choose to protect themselves with this cushion up until their late 20s, if not later. Others, like myself, have a desire to be independent. We appreciate the guidance and support given to us by our parents or whoever raised us, but we also understand that it's important to be able to stand on our own two feet. I personally feel privileged to be able to move upwards in life and have the opportunity to build my own life separate from everything else that I have always had.

This idea that I was pondering yesterday on my way home from work, had me thinking about something that someone said to me a very long time ago. This always stuck with me, and I laugh about it every so often.

I was about 6 or 7 years old, on the bus ride home from school. It was time for me to get off of the bus and so I started gathering my stuff and unbuckling my seatbelt. As I was doing so, the girl sitting next to me turned to me and asked, "Deb, did you know that I'm rich?"

Now, you may be wondering what this may have to do with growing up. Stick with me here.

I remember thinking to myself... first, what does it mean to be rich? Like, I genuinely did not know what it meant to be rich and why she was telling me this. I was so confused. I mean, I grew up very comfortable too, but I never had my parents telling me that we were rich or had it better than others. I was only about 6 years old anyway, so what 6-year-old goes around talking about being rich?

As I grew older and started encountering this "I'm rich" mentality, I began referring back to this initial exposure I had to such self-inflation and monetary obsession.

What really was interesting to me though was how young people my age were SO proud of their parents' wealth or high social standing. It was as if they themselves had some sort of influence on their parents' success too. These kids were walking around like they conquered the planet because their parents were successful. I always found that to be so frustrating. My parents are also successful and have always offered my siblings and me everything we needed (and most of the time what we wanted). However, there was a balance and there was exposure. We were taught that hard work was the cost. We always had nice things but knew that not everything had to be the most expensive or the most high-standard.

The other day as I was scrolling through my social media feed, I saw a photo that someone posted with her new Mercedez. I felt part of me looking at the photo wishfully, considering how nice it would be to have a Mercedez. However, as quickly as that thought entered my mind... I then became encapsulated by another idea and a different mindset that I would like to carry forward.

"What is the purpose?"

Not that we shouldn't buy nice things and share our excitement... I'm all for it! However, seeing someone else have something and THEN considering how happy you would be to have said thing... isn't that absurd?!

I all of a sudden realized the ridiculous notion of rich, expensive, high-end, call it what you want...

Because what is the purpose? And what is the value of all that?
How would having a Mercedez make me happier? Maybe it is more comfortable, but do I really need it to be happy? Is it really worth my time looking at it and considering how happy I could be with it?

And that takes me back to the beginning story of the "rich" girl.

I think that it is when we understand the value of all that we have and the price it takes for all of those things... when we truly realize what is actually important. At least in my case, thinking about being financially independent... sure I will splurge on nice things here and there. But when you have worked hard for what you have earned, you should putt all that hard work and effort towards things that will make you feel true happiness (I'm not actually telling you what you should do with your hard-earned money. You obviously decide. To each his own. However, perhaps consider this stance).

True happiness, I think, is living with purpose. When one has a purpose and lives according to the blueprint of that purpose, everything else seems to fall into place. Once I became aware of what truly mattered to me, I stopped looking at labels as much as I used to. I stopped looking at what other people had. I stopped caring so much about what I didn't have. I started realizing that I don't need certain things to achieve my purpose. And so, therefore, those objects are not needed for me to be truly happy. 

Furthermore, when you become independent, you start realizing that you have to supply the lifestyle that you want or once had. Just because your parents had the ability to do and buy all these things for you, doesn't necessarily mean that you will. It's time for you to step up, put in the hard work... and decide if all that stuff is really even that important. I certainly plan to continue the quality of life that I have always been blessed to have, but this is a whole different chapter. I think it's rather exciting to see how my opinions on these matters might change.

I am fully aware that not everyone thinks this way. Heck, many people make money just to spend it on more material things. However, I think this mentality that I just shared is important to consider.

From now on, I have decided to ask myself this question whenever getting enchanted by an object or idea.

Does this align with my purpose? Does this align with my blueprint? Will it help these factors in any way?

If the answer is no, turn away from those things and find what does align with your purpose and your blueprint. You will end up happier (truly happier) in the long run.

I Am Not Who I Think You Think I Am

An interesting realization that I would like to share:

I was listening to a talk by Simon Sinek and he was discussing how people care too much about what other people think. In fact, people tend to care so much about others' opinions, that they tend to act just how they think others would perceive them to be.

I realized that I tend to do this myself.

And I hate that.

I realized earlier on that I tend to act shy in environments where I think the people around me think I am quiet, loud in environments where I think people think I am social, nervous in situations where others would expect for me to be nervous, etc. This is obviously so delusional and silly... yet natural in a weird and annoying way. Perhaps because I feel that I don't want to step out of my bounds... the self-imposed boundaries, that is :/

However, I am a social person when I want to be social (and that's with certain people and in certain environments). I get nervous in front of big crowds though not as nervous as others probably expect me to be. I could be quiet at times, but it's not because I'm shy.

I should act according to who I want to be and not how I think others think I am or should be. This is so obvious but I think more people do it than we realize. I think this is why it is so important to be aware of who you are and more importantly how you see best fit to conduct yourself. It is important to not just go with the flow and be who and how others expect us to be. We should act according to our values and visions. I think the best way to ensure this is to just be aware and keep ourselves in check.

Also, isn't it interesting how there are certain obvious truths that we as individuals may not recognize until someone points them out to us? I was recently talking to a friend about various aspects of life that I came to recognize. He said that he appreciated hearing my perspective on life and situations because I bring up points that he may not have ever thought about. I responded with the idea that conversing with others is so important for that very reason- because we learn and expand off of one another. What I realize and pull away from something he may not have thought of... and vice versa. This is the whole idea of being able to learn so much from others- just as I had learned such an important truth by listening to Simon Sinek.

I have started becoming an avid listener of Simon Sinek's and so would like to share one of my favorite videos of his:

Also, a quote that my friend had shared with me that I really appreciate. There are so many hidden truths that may not even be that hidden... but sometimes it may be harder to see them.

“You are so young, so much before all beginning, and I would like to beg you, dear Sir, as well as I can, to have patience with everything unresolved in your heart and to try to love the questions themselves as if they were locked rooms or books written in a very foreign language. Don't search for the answers, which could not be given to you now, because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer”

- Letters To A Young Poet, Rainer Maria Rilke