Yesterday marked a year since I moved to NYC. Over the last several weeks I’ve had some encounters and experiences that have shed some light on this journey and the way it has all unfolded.
I found myself on the UWS the other day doing an IV drip in an apartment looking out onto New Jersey. I realized I was right across the exact location where I used to sit in Jersey when I would come up north. I would sit between these huge pillars (I spotted that landmark) and just stare out at the city. I always felt drawn to it- that the city was where I belonged. It was always my happy place. When I decided to make this move, I looked out onto the city one last time and wondered how it would go.
As I sat there looking back at that place- and looking back at myself- my client put on the Netflix documentary “Moses.” She started to talk about the Bible, G-d, faith, how Moses was chosen and didn’t even believe in himself, how he never got to see the Promised Land, how people experience pain, and what that means. Where does it take us? She told me that she felt G-d wasn’t present in her life the way He used to be. I told her I know exactly how that feels. I told her that I’m Jewish and that although I don’t have all the answers, I do believe that everything in life is a test that is meant to make us greater and that G-d wants a relationship with us. Everything we experience is a conversation with Him- the blessings and the challenges. Respond to them with prayer, reflection, and faith. I truly believe this because I see it in my life and I think if you think about it you’ll see that truth in your life as well.
I realized that every experience I had sitting by those pillars in Jersey has led me to this moment and every other moment when I have had these connections where I look back on my personal experiences which have allowed me this understanding. Just as someone had told me something the other week that I needed to hear and that they felt they were meant to tell me- this time I shared what someone else needed to hear and I was meant to be there to tell her. This year was about learning this lesson and here I was passing it on.
God constantly slowly shows us why He plans things out the way He does. Every experience we have is G-d communicating with us, and that understanding finally clicked for me. We just have to be open to that conversation. We have to involve ourselves.
As I walked out the door, I felt the close of a chapter. This last chapter was about understanding WHY. Now that I know the why, this next chapter is about understanding HOW. How do I make the most of the why?
How do you make the most of your why?